in desperation to find the code that i've been dreaming of.
and it's just
not
there.
this is really bad. i feel like i cant foster anymore hope or optimism to convince myself that i'll do good if i work hard enough.
and i just cant see myself there. i cant see myself receiving my results and be happy about it. be happy that i'll be able to land in the course i'd love.
this just terrifies me, but on a lighter note, people do have hope and it's nice to hear that there are only a few who think i'll be able to work towards my goal. that's just really nice.
other than that i've received the art o-level paper and it just freaks me out.
