today's zoo training went a lot well that i thought. the presentation assessment wasnt really that bad. i hoped that i get tested for mangrove swamps and i did. so the universe didnt proved me wrong this time.
but the trip back home with Sue May was pleasantly nice. we talked about so much things that i opened up to. we talked about how alone we are. and things like that. we talked about the sincerity between friendships and things like that.
yes. i did. but right now i'm trying not to make the same mistake. i try not to get too attached to people so in return we dont have to return any favours.
"have you ever felt that youre always there for someone and that that person was never there for you?"
"do you have any friends? like you know, close ones, after school? weekends, holidays?"no. not easy to find someone that fits your soul.
also things like how we honestly think about each other.and that is honestly what i am i guess. the only thing i'm good at. pushing people away and fucking things up.
she said that i gave off the kind of 'mean' vibe in class. that when i'm approached, i push people away.
"i feel like crying, i'm just going to go home and cry" i feel ya buddy right here /pumps fist at chest/
funny how the person who you least expect you can open up to are able to talk them out with you. i gave a lot of thought about what we talked about in the train and…
nearly broke down on the streets. i dont know what i was sobbing for. what i was angry for.
and i sobbed my way home.
so much feelings involved in one day.
