book of the metaphor

I could have done anything for you. I would've done anything in my wake to make things better instead you pushed me away like this. Some nights I blame myself. Some nights I try to convince myself that I have made the right move because I have given in too often. However it may be I still want to believe that we can have a closure. Reach out to me, please, I'm exhausted, depleted, from trying.

A.

HOWEVER IN OTHER NEWS
a) I have finally gotten a job which means I'll get more preoccupied
b) which does mean I'll be constantly busy which
c) makes it seem like my life has a purpose hAH

book of the vibe

dear

despite my declaration of having myself isolated out of contentment before, i guess i have been getting a lot better. i've got good vibes around me whenever i'm training and it feels great, for the most part. however it frustrates me the most when i think about how weak i am as compared to the days of when i was participating and competing actively. (and back then i was also quite weak, so that says a lot)

i need that pep talk to get myself out of this shitty mental turmoil like the one i had 4 years ago, a few months before i sustained an injury from climbing. i hope a few more months can get me back on track. and probably along the way i'll stay out of any injury.

best wishes,