book of the faith

i remember how different people are. and yet they all say the same thing.
"you don't have faith in him"

and it's not that i don't have fatith in him, and it's not that i don't trust him, and it's not that i don't love him enough.

i do, i really do.

it's not that i can't look far and have no clue as to where we could be. it's just that i don't see it ending.

and it's not that i can chime those things with such confidence that it will surely happen, because we'll never know what He has in store for us. and i trust that whatever happens is what He knows is best.

book of the soak

monday, feb 2nd

sat in the shower with a throbbing headache. all i was feeling was just a sense of disappointment. not at anyone or at any of the predicament i was in. just at myself.
i shouldn't sweat at the small things, or divulge and get too deep into anything that shouldn't be bothering me. but i just do.

if any of you can tell me at least how, to digress and not let any of this bother me, please do.

it just felt like a long morning. and i just sat there letting all the water soak me thinking, god, you're such a disappointment. you turned out to be everything you thought you'll never be.

but all is well.

10:15 a.m

the day is going good, so far.